2nd update..Heffalump…Hissy Fit

Maxine cartoon 0001

The Hissy Fit was mine, people, mine! Shocking to some, but it will bring a wry smile to the lips of those who know me from yonks ago. Yep, I can throw a hissy and when I do it’s usually for a very good and very long brewed reason….so I make it worth everyone’s while as well as mine. It rarely lasts for long.

As I said in my last update, I was moved from a nice little ward with a sweet lady Beth, gorgeous girl Amber, and a charming old gent Wilbur, to the next ward along. Actually it’s closer to the exit so that may be trying to tell me something…..do you think?

This ward had 3 guys in it and little old me. At first I wasn’t too chuffed but they all had their curtains pulled so it felt private and nice.  Until the afternoon. I was returned to this new hangout while still feeling a tad groggy after my bone marrow aspiration. (Oh what a lovely euphoria that was for such a fleeting hour or so!).

I was hauled out of my pleased and somewhat smug thoughts of landing a window seat with the sunshine streaming in so invitingly, very quickly by the sudden loud addition of the TV across the way while the gent (I don’t think of him as one now) watched rugby and read his book at the same time.

Rare thing that…..a man who can multi-task. N.B. This statement does not apply to all men. Some are amazingly deft and able.

Basic Skills Agency - Moved Next Door.

The guy next to him and diagonally across from me was undergoing some sort of hissy fit of his own having just been transferred from Nambour. He has some form of the Big C and they had attached a chemo treatment to his IV which made him quiet rather suddenly. A real country bum probably reared on whacky weed and later partook of the popular ICE. I shouldn’t judge, but it’s a description I know you will all recognise.

The guy next to me was from the beef country in Rockhampton and was bleeding profusely from a wound (surgically done) on his nose and forehead thanks to a skin cancer. I hope this guy heals and goes on to care for his Brahman bulls for many years to come. A true bushie. He didn’t think twice about giving me his beef sandwiches at lunch time today when he was leaving for home pastures. He knows what a starving woman is capable of!

The noise from the TV stayed at the same level despite two very ill patients in the same room. Each time the toilet was needed by moi, guess who was in there? Our rugby loving, book reading jerk of course.

This wasn’t the whole reason for my hissy fit though. I can take a little noise and I was tapping away as I am now (softly though and somewhat comforting a new young male patient tonight, has remarked) on my laptop. No the real reason was the staff had not taken me off the Nil By Mouth list in the office region of the ward, so although it was gone from my bed, the food people were excluding me from food, tea, coffee and whatever.

No lunch, no afternoon tea (they serve cordial which I am going to query one day when I can be bothered….so much sugar!), no dinner, no supper…capped with lots of noise makes Jo a very irritable person. Add to that the loud noise from the TV listening to stuff I have no interest in whatsoever, including his choice of ABC programs, I was livid by the time he turned it off at 11pm.


I adore Maxine right now. She says it all so much better than I can because she frowns so beautifully don’t you think?

With lights out, the machines began to beep…flat batteries, fluids needing replacing and topping up and so on. All the obs needed doing and that bloody BP machine that is so wonderfully and mysteriously automatic beeps and yells and carries on like a lunatic every time it tried to register mine last night as it was so bloody high.

My last extremely tired and hungry look at the clock was 3.45am. I was rudely woken again by the nurse for more BP torture at 5am. Great!!

Puffy eyes, worse than before thanks to Heffy’s efforts, aches and pains and generally feeling a tad over it all, greeted me in the bathroom’s mirror this morning. Not a pretty sight believe me and I cringed in horror myself.

I returned to my bed and was regretfully informed by Bazza my beef man from Rocky that they had declined to leave a cup of tea or coffee for me because I was still Nil By Mouth.

That was the last straw. I’d had a disappointing battle with one of the most ridiculously designed hospital gowns I have to wear because of the IV in my hand, which I might add, decided to slip out while in the shower and needed to be threaded back in carefully by a pregnant nurse called Leila. She is having a girl and calling her Zahlia.

I thought I’d add that last bit in to take the crabbiness off a bit. Did I do good or not? No?

Then to be told no coffee or tea again which meant for sure, no lunch etc….again.

I stormed up to the desk where a very lazy doctor sat with his back to me. I got his attention promptly by saying I was sorry to be an inconvenience but I needed to speak with someone who could possibly help me. He lumbered out to the next office with as much energy and interest as a sloth sitting on his favoured tree branch in a cool spot in the jungle.

To cut a long story short, I was reinstated to the list set aside for those allowed to eat, drink and ….well not be merry but at least not be famished. Lunch, afternoon tea which I skip because it’s cordial, dinner and now my best coffee of the day for supper (it’s hot and made properly) were all enjoyed as much as is possible to enjoy congealed mush, half heated frozen veges followed by ice cream and canned fruit. So nutritious….not.

Maxine--Stuff Strutted

Exhausted but enjoying a much awaited visit from Tim for the afternoon, who stayed with my eldest sister last night and again tonight so we can have a few hours over the weekend to laugh and talk things through, and as in today’s case, cry…. I was highly emotional this afternoon.

I had been warned by my new lovely case doctor from Hematology, Ross. He visited me this morning and chatted for some time and gave me invaluable information as to why so many blood tests, how far they think Heffy has spread his heaving body and limbs, and the plans being plotted to send him on his way. One of the things he said was that I would have highs and lows but mostly lows now with the steroids that will help reduce Heffy’s weight problem before they hit him between the eyes with the R Cut chemo trick.

maxine 2Emotional I have been. I cried at the drop of a hat at times with Tim and yet other times I felt my old courage and determination come to the fore again for a while before the next flood. All good for me I’m sure. Not so good for Tim though. He is doing this tough too and his blood count has been up and down, all round the mulberry bush of late. Something I was afraid of and one of the main reasons I am so pleased his parents are on their way from Perth. They will keep him up and on his feet and doing the right thing for his own health’s sake.

This evening I am happy to report that the whacky weed kid has been moved out….to where who knows? My Beef Country man has gone home to Rocky to care for his thousands of bulls. We have a young man who sleeps a lot next to me and is very polite. And the jerk across the way overheard me telling Tim during one of my meltdowns about how far down the scale I rated him in the gent stakes for being such an inconsiderate, rude, obnoxious, uncaring, disrespectful arsehole…..and the volume of the never-off TV has been turned down to the lower numbers on the remote. I can still hear it but it’s not so intolerable. The nurses have noticed too and one has just reminded him he needs his sleep too….which meant the jerk dozed off an hour ago but left the bloody TV on.

Can’t win and I’m not going to try with him. Hopefully he’ll be moved on tomorrow as he has surgery some time on Monday and said he’d be going to a specialist ward, to his poor down-turned-in-the-mouth-large wife this afternoon. Anyway, I might be moved to my new beaut ward tomorrow in Hematology if they manage to get it arranged before Monday. Either way I hope never to see this jerk any time soon once one of us has departed this ward.

So as you can see, I’m not all light, hope and happiness right now….I’m still determined, positive and totally fed up with Heffy….he’s so heavy in my neck and it’s far from comfortable. He is to get his karma-uppance soon.

It’s 8.30ish PM now, and I hope to turn off the lights soon and have a darned good sleep tonight that will rid me of these puffy eyes, aches and pains. Still on the Onwards street, but not so much the Upwards street right now….the turnoff will return just up the highway though, of that I am sure. It’s just a steroid-induced low. Made worse with an extreme lack of coffee and tea.

adage 5

Till next time, goodnight, good morning, depending on where you are and thank you for sticking with me through this rocky road. It is making it so much easier for me, please believe me. With much love.






5 thoughts on “2nd update..Heffalump…Hissy Fit

  1. Carol Matthews May 21, 2016 at 11:08 am Reply

    Love, hugs, hope, tissues, virtual tea and coffee on tap, with you every step of the way lovely brave honest Jo

    • joskehan May 22, 2016 at 4:32 am Reply

      Thankyou Carol. Much love.

  2. Gerri Bowen May 21, 2016 at 6:43 pm Reply

    I’d have a hissy fit too, Jo. A loud, informative-to-others hissy fit. They do help and get the good juices flowing. I wish you a wonderful good night’s sleep. 😀

    • joskehan May 22, 2016 at 4:31 am Reply

      I think there may be a few more hissy fits in the future Gerri as I have spoken to a few of my doctors and they were aghast at the lack of food and attention given…words were spoken by them to the staff I think and things have improved. The doctors have reminded me to speak up asap rather than let it get to me and cause high BP readings etc. Lol. It’s all good.

  3. Jan Brigden May 23, 2016 at 12:53 pm Reply

    Jo, I think I’d have been struggling not to have a hissy fit too. Always better to let it out rather than fume in silence. Loving your nicknames for various people and glad to read that the Nil by Mouth situation is now resolved. How very dare they?! You don’t need any added stress. Sending much love and massive hugs xxx

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