First outing for coffee and cake

Jam Jar

This morning I felt good. My jelly belly had more substance and the sun was shining outside beautifully, inviting us to venture out and enjoy. I suggested to my sister that we have morning tea downstairs at the Jam Jar Coffee Shop. Surprised, she wanted assurances from me that I would be well enough to do it. I was full of confidence. Not only is it a short trip down in the lift, along a pretty path through the units, past the reception area, down the front steps, a short walk along the pavement and we’re there.

While I am feeling able, strike while the iron is hot I reckon. So we did.

The young woman who runs the place and her staff are all lovely and ready for a chat, and my sister loves people who like to chat. So do I usually. The lemon slice took my eye at first look, so the decision was made and I found a nice table for us.


As we enjoyed our cake and coffee, I waited for exhaustion to hit me. It didn’t come. What a great feeling! On our way back eventually, we walked to a little park not far down the road as I need to use my legs and keep my strength up otherwise I’ll end up a wizened old lady with a walking frame well before my time. If you don’t use it, you lose it.

I can see the Jam Jar becoming a frequent place for us to visit during our stay here. It’s a delight, the staff are wonderful, the food is delicious and the coffee is the best I’ve had in a long time. As you can imagine, I am thrilled with the outcome of today. Yes, I had a Nana Nap today, but I have them most days now anyway. I admit I was very much in need of it after lunch when the day began to catch up on my energy levels a bit. I regard today as a huge success in my next step toward being well again. No doubt there will be hiccups along the way following future treatments, but I will take the successes as they come.

love keeps the cold out

Today I thought a little more about the middle aged couple we met at my last visit to the hospital. It is such a shame they are drifting so far apart at a time in their lives when they need to be closer and more honest than ever before in their relationship. I know nothing about their lives together of course, but assuming they were muddling along happily enough before the husband became ill, it makes me sad to think the bonds were maybe not strong enough to see them through the worst battle of their marriage.

Recently I read an article in a magazine about what can happen to couples when one falls very ill or totally dependent on the other, and especially when it’s sudden. The main advice was to be honest and transparent with each other….express your fears, doubts, opinions, love and even when you are feeling annoyed with the other for whatever reason. From part of the conversation I overheard with their social worker, the anger, hate and blame this fellow felt toward his wife was all news to her and the shock registered on her face immediately. I wanted to hug her….she went white, her eyes teared up and she sat there shaking her head in disbelief. He continued to glare angrily at the world from tired sick eyes.

I began writing this blog for a few reasons, the first being to help myself get my head around what I had been diagnosed with and what the prognosis could/should be. There were chunks of information from the doctors that I neglected to convey to Tim in those first confusing days, purely because my brain wasn’t functioning too well and the memory drew blanks as I talked to him on the phone. When he came to the hospital the first time, it was far from private and at that time I was a blithering soppy mess and couldn’t get the words out anyway, so it was a blessing when the team of doctors visited while he was there.

Since then it has been very important to ensure Tim is kept in the loop. Long distance makes it difficult and telephone conversations don’t always cover every aspect of the events of the day. It’s hard for Tim. Not knowing the facts and what is happening day by day can be stressful and hurtful. My big fear was that this stress would play havoc with his diabetes – which has happened a few times, but we are getting better at managing that and avoiding the pitfalls. Being totally open, clear and honest is the only way to go.



I hope that couple get the help and counselling they need, so that they can survive this rough patch, even if it means they go their separate ways by the time the fellow is well again. Personally, (don’t shoot me for this) I think the wife deserves better.

shine your light

So tomorrow I have another blood test, followed by an appointment with one of the doctors. It would be too lucky if it was Jason Butler again.

Speaking of luck…….last night I dreamt my sister and I won Lotto. I didn’t find out how much but it was a nice amount. The ticket was called East West….strange really, but it was so real, we have decided that the next time we see a newsagent, a ticket will be purchased and called just that. You never know your luck!

Take care everyone, enjoy whatever it is you are doing. Much love, gratitude and many hugs from me.




10 thoughts on “First outing for coffee and cake

  1. Trevor Belshaw June 8, 2016 at 12:37 pm Reply

    Good read, yet again. Glad you enjoyed the outing. Do it again soon. As for the other couple, don’t waste your positive energy on them, it’s sad, but they’re not you and Tim, they may have their own ways of coping. Just concentrate on you for now.

    • joskehan June 9, 2016 at 9:48 am Reply

      Yes, it was really just an observation of others around me. The coffee shop will become a regular thing I think, as long as I feel well. xx

  2. Fran Macilvey June 8, 2016 at 2:00 pm Reply

    Thank you for your post. It is lovely to share your discoveries. :-)) xx

  3. Gerri Bowen June 8, 2016 at 6:38 pm Reply

    Yay, you had your cake! You deserved a treat. As for the couple, I agree with you; she does deserve better. Sounds as if you and Tim are able to communicate in all ways, and that’s a good thing. Keep sparkling, Jo!

    • joskehan June 9, 2016 at 9:47 am Reply

      As long as I can have my occasional cake, I am sure to be sparkling, lol. xx

  4. Jan Brigden June 8, 2016 at 6:41 pm Reply

    Good to hear your latest update, Jo. That coffee house sounds fabulous. Those cakes! 🙂 so pleased you were able to get out and enjoy the time with your sister. It’s a shame about the couple you mention. As you say, hopefully they can become close again in time. People react in all sorts of ways to things and it’s a comfort to know that you & Tim, in contrast, share great love & mutual support. Love and big hugs. xx

    • joskehan June 9, 2016 at 9:46 am Reply

      We went to the coffee shop again today and had the soup of the day for lunch which was pea and ham soup….delicious!

  5. Doreen June 8, 2016 at 9:10 pm Reply

    Delighted to know you had your coffee and cake. And a more pleasant time out from all the medical drama of the recent weeks. As for the couple, well he has probably been playing the blame game for years and she’s put up with it. Maybe she was hoping that this medical drama would change him and would get him appreciate her more and appreciate life more. Clearly that’s not happened, yet. You and Tim have an entirely different relationship. A kind, caring and loving relationship which was there long before your medical drama. Let’s hope that dream is bringing you a winning ticket. Luv, hugs and healing Dxxxxx

  6. joskehan June 9, 2016 at 9:45 am Reply

    I consider myself very lucky with my relationship, Doreen, but I did feel for this lady. I probably will never see her again, but I do hope it gets better for her. xxx

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