It’s been a tough week

darkest night

Since seeing Kirk, I’ve had a not so nice week. My blood levels were ok on the Tuesday but I feel they went downhill rapidly on the Wednesday and by Friday when I saw Emma, I was flat out holding my head up. There was an emergency in the waiting room and Emma was the first doctor on the scene, so that delayed my appointment by about an hour.

By the time I did see her, the blood tests were back and she decided I needed blood. My white and red cells are very low, but she hoped the transfusion would fix that. I don’t think it fixed it as well as expected. So all week I’ve been sleeping a lot, or just lolling about on the couch with no will to move too far. Food is not enjoyable at the moment, mainly because I have a couple of ulcers in the mouth…they hurt like hell. The last time my blood count was extremely low, I got an ulcer then too. The mouth lining is rather fragile although we do punish it with spicy food etc, and is the first place to break down when the immune system is at its lowest.


I gave in to my lethargy and took to the bed. I detest being bed bound at any time, but this week there seemed to be no other option. My temperature was spiking as I was being given the blood, and the nurses warned me that if it continued to rise I was to go to the hospital. It has been up and down over the past couple of days, and my head although it has no hair, gets very hot. I splash cold water on the back of my head when I feel the temp is a bit high. So far it has worked. Salty mouth washes are done often too….I have to be rid of these things.

I suffer pains and twinges in my stomach and back and when I had to describe one such twinge to Emma, I said it was my ‘Pendysawdust’ which she thought was hilarious. As a kid I used to get pain over my appendicitis area and my father being a lover of his saw milling, sawdust, wood etc, would tell me it was nothing but ‘Pendysawdust’. I have called it that for all these years.

Lying in bed watching TV, it is horrific to see so much killing and unrest in the world. It is all a bit scary I think. I did get a laugh about Boris being given the job of Foreign Affairs Minister (well that’s what we’d call him here anyway)…I think the new British PM has a sense of humour and has given him that job so that karma may catch up with him sooner than he expected. He was the coward who legged it – or tried to – after inciting everyone to vote for the Leave option. Such a scum bag will fit in nicely in some of those horrid countries he is going to have to visit.

dont give up

I’ve actually been out of bed for about three hours now….wow! I’m ready to go back though and settle for the night I think. I’m hoping tomorrow is a better day with more energy. My next appointment with Kate is Tuesday and I have to self inject till then at least. Wednesday and Thursday will be days off so to speak, then Friday I have a 7.30am start at the hospital with blood tests, bone biopsy, maybe an LP (the jury is still out on that one), and CAT scans. Haven’t been told if the PET scan is happening as well, but I doubt there will be enough time in the day. We will see.

broken crayon

On that note, I will say goodnight. I hope you all have a wonderful weekend. Your messages on Facebook have been the main things that has kept me going this past week. This is the first time I’ve used the laptop, relying on the phone only….weird things happen on the phone, but I think that’s because the print is so darned small and the bedroom is so darned dark!! I don’t need glasses, but when it’s dark I can’t see what I need to see.

Goodnight. Take care. Be kind to others. Much love and big hugs. xxxx


6 thoughts on “It’s been a tough week

  1. Gerri Bowen July 16, 2016 at 5:41 pm Reply

    I’m sorry you’re going through this, Jo. Your strength will see you through, as well as your sense of humor and of the ridiculous. Keep that sparkle going, Jo.

    • joskehan July 17, 2016 at 3:09 am Reply

      There is a glimmer of light at the end of this eternal tunnel just now Gerri. Hugs. xxx

  2. ursula dewar. July 17, 2016 at 3:35 am Reply

    Just after 1pm and I have just read this. So sorry all seems to be so heavy for you Jo but as you yourself say you have the strength to see you keep jogging along. Well perhaps not in those words but have no doubt you will get my drift. Nancy rang me yesterday and told me that her sister-in-law has had quite a beating too with the treatment. She has CA of a tonsil. Has been down here for quite a few weeks but went back to her home in Yandina yesterday I think Nancy said. Apparently she has had some mental upsets with massive mood swings resulting from the heavy medication etc.. Nancy said that all seemed to be on the upward curve for her but will have to return to the RBH monthly for treatment I think she said. I have been a tad sluggish myself but just put this down to laziness perhaps. Didn’t go to Mass again today and Sister rang me which was nice but I have no doubt I will be off to a good start this week. Must try and get busy with some art work. This always keeps my thoughts centered and not flip about like a crazy creature. Well I guess what I write is of interest please let me know if not as I don’t have all that much of interest to tell. If what I tell you is of no interest let me know and I will just let it go. Okay? God Bless you with gentle hugs and prayers from me. XXXX

    • joskehan July 17, 2016 at 3:56 am Reply

      Hello Ursula, Good to hear from you. Sorry to hear about Nancy’s sister in law…I think as the courses advance along, chemo becomes much harder to take for one’s body. I’ve been lucky so far I think. I’m hoping for a better week this week in preparation of all the tests on Friday.
      Being sluggish as you say is sometimes a good thing especially in the cool weather we’ve been having lately.
      I’m a tad disappointed in my progress this past week (far from negative though) because I had hoped I’d be able to come out for a visit on one of my good weeks to see you… will come, but this is a hump I have to get over.
      Much love and big hugs. xxxxx

  3. Doreen July 17, 2016 at 11:12 am Reply

    Hi Jo, so sorry to know you’re not going so well. With all those drugs your having you’ve done so remarkedly well. Everything in life is transient so hopefully you will begin to feel an improvement again. Always thinking of you and sending you luv,hugs and healing.
    ps, hope Tim is over his sniffles.Dxxxxx

    • joskehan July 18, 2016 at 1:29 am Reply

      Hi Doreen, both of us are feeling better today thank goodness. Tomorrow is appt day with the doctor again (Tues) so hoping all is looking up. Hugs. xxxx

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